Mandated Reporters

Because I am a teacher, I know the ins and outs of what happens at a school.  I also know the legal requirements and the rationale behind them.  One of those requirements is that anyone who works with children is considered a "mandated reporter" by DCF.  This means that if they suspect any type of …

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I Remain

"God only gives you what you can handle" ........"Whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger"... I've heard these phrases many times since I served John.  They are always spoken by well meaning people who likely don't know what to say so they rely on these common phrases.... but these words mean very little when you …

You Are Loved

It's really easy to get lost amidst the stress and the drama of a divorce.  It's too easy to forget that you are loved.... to easy to feel lost and alone.  This is especially true when the person that you are divorcing is controlling and abusive.  I felt myself withering away.  There were times that... …

The Parenting Plan

I love my children more than I could possibly put into words.  I love them more than the air that I breathe.  They are everything that is good in this world.  I would do anything to protect them.  I would die to protect them.  I always thought that would be enough.... but I was wrong.  …

Paralyzing Fear

  The decision to get a divorce was not an easy one.  While, at this point in my story, I was aware that this was not a healthy relationship, there was this overwhelming, paralyzing fear that was holding me back.  Fear that I was exactly what John had said I was and no one else …

My College Family

It's amazing how a person can allow life's circumstances to isolate them and make them feel alone, even when they are surrounded by people who love them.  This is one thing I learned about myself in the process of gaining the strength to leave John.  The entire time that I cried myself to sleep.... that …

Evie

Work continued to be a place where I found support, love and happiness.  The relationships I built with my coworkers gave me a place to unload and hear the message that I deserved better and that John's treatment of me was a reflection of him and not something that I was, in some way, asking …

Jane

I was nervous as I waited for the counselor to open her door and call my name.  Abby and I had essentially picked her off of the internet and I was about to trust her with things that I hadn't told anyone.  I clasped my hands to try and hide the fact that they were …

Nora

As I mentioned in my previous post, there are many people that helped me to realize that my relationship with John was a toxic one.  Nora was one of those people.  We had worked at the same school for a few years.  She was the teacher in the behavioral program in our school.  Somehow she …

A Turning Point

My eyes had been opened.  John's comment, making a comparison of having our children to surviving hell, was the straw that broke the camel's back.  I may not have been strong enough to admit that something was wrong when his darkness was directed at me.... but this was different.... this was about my children. This …